Search Results for fashionably-dead

When Astrid tries to stop smoking she ends up a member of the undead. She had never believed in vampyres before, but now she knows that they do exist no matter what she thought before.

Author: Robyn Peterman

Publisher: Robyn\Peterman

ISBN: 0989496023

Category: Love stories

Page: 320

View: 777

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When Astrid tries to stop smoking she ends up a member of the undead. She had never believed in vampyres before, but now she knows that they do exist no matter what she thought before.
2014-02-18 By Robyn Peterman

I'm dead.Life is still good.I have unconditional love. And on most days, when I'm not covered in Zombie guts, I'm wildly fashionable. Fashionably dead, that is, and loving it.

Author: Robyn Peterman

Publisher:

ISBN: 9798577025106

Category:

Page: 258

View: 838

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Being an undead Princess comes with baggage. And unfortunately, it's not Prada. Getting shredded in the Daily Fang, The Bloody Times and The National Dhampir is par for the course in the life of a royal Vampyre-especially mine. However, that's nothing compared to the sh%tshow unfolding in my life. My nightmares are coming true. Satan is throwing fits about changing diapers.The Baby Demons are full of cryptic messages. Martha and Jane have a sphincter obsession. There's a half-naked Demon in my closet with a mouth as foul as mine. On top of all that, we're hosting Demon-hating royal houseguests. Oh, and did I mention the Vampyre-eating-Zombies on the west coast? With Ethan by my side, along with new friends and a few well-hidden enemies, it's time to adjust my crown, put a few Vampyres in their place, and kick some Zombie butt. I'm dead.Life is still good.I have unconditional love. And on most days, when I'm not covered in Zombie guts, I'm wildly fashionable. Fashionably dead, that is, and loving it.
2020-12-05 By Robyn Peterman

"Welcome to hell.

Author: Robyn Peterman

Publisher: Fashionably Dead Down Under

ISBN: 098949604X

Category: Demonology

Page: 310

View: 843

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"Welcome to hell. Literally. The Hell where the Prince of Darkness is hotter than Hades, Hell Hounds smell like brownies and the Seven Deadly Sins are addicted to Facebook...Not to mention the soundtrack in the Underworld is Journey. For real. I should have known no good could come from offing my parents in the space of twenty minutes no matter how psychotic and evil they were... Now I find out my family tree includes almost every deity and mythological being alive while Ethan, the one and only love of my undead life has a limited time down under before he turns to dust. In the land of Sin, you'd think I'd get some nookie time with my man, but no. Baby Demons, cousins and grandparents put the kibosh on that. Blue balls are the new normal. What the hell does a half-Vampyre Half-Demon have to do to catch a break? Apparently find a freakin' sword, calm Mother Nature's unmedicated mood swings and make sure Mister Rogers keeps his sticky fingers to himself during weekly poker with the Devil. And I have three days to do it. By all that's unholy, I thought Ethan's Vampyre family was crazy... Trust me, they have nothing on the Demons,"--back cover.
2014-04-21 By Robyn Peterman

Vampyres don't exist.

Author: Robyn Peterman

Publisher:

ISBN: OCLC:881379650

Category: Vampires

Page:

View: 950

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Vampyres don't exist. They absolutely do not exist. At least I didn't think they did 'til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead? Now I'm a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren't bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe. On the downside, I'm stuck with an obscenely profane Guardian Angel who looks like Oprah and a Fairy Fighting Coach who's teaching me to annihilate like the Terminator. To complicate matters, my libido has increased to Vampyric proportions and my attraction to a hotter than Satan's underpants killer rogue Vampyre is not only dangerous ... it's possibly deadly. For real dead. Permanent death isn't on my agenda. Avoiding him is my only option. Of course, since he thinks I'm his, it's easier said than done. Like THAT'S not enough to deal with, all the other Vampyres think I'm some sort of Chosen One. Holy Hell, if I'm in charge of saving an entire race of blood suckers, the Undead are in for one hell of a ride.
2013 By Robyn Peterman

I know I'm already mated.

Author: Robyn Peterman

Publisher:

ISBN: 1537414933

Category: Demonology

Page: 336

View: 330

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I know I'm already mated...I wanna get married.What do you get when you combine a three headed monster named Charles, a rotund, gay, dancing Demon named Doug, a culinary disaster baked by Mother Nature, a celibate premarital councilor named Jeff, an offer from Satan that's impossible to refuse and Steve Perry?You get the Royal Wedding from Hell-or to be more accurate-possibly in Hell.All I want to do is marry the Vampyre of my dreams with my closest friends and family in attendance. Yep, I know nuptials in the undead world are unheard of, but I'm still hanging onto my humanity if only by a thread. Being mated is great, but getting married is important to me.Tacky invitations and cake that causes food poisoning aside, I also need to deal with the stream of Demons entering my world from mysteriously opened portals. Not to mention Angel Jeff is going to fail us on the premarital test if we participate in any nookie before the wedding. I'm trying really hard not to go bridezilla on everyone. With five days to plan the wedding, I have figure out who's opening the portals and deal with our hostile allies who think our wedding is a farce. It's been a very difficult week-especially the no nookie part.All I know is this, I will say I do on Saturday even if it I have to go to Hell and back to accomplish it.
2016-09-20 By Robyn Peterman

And I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard.

Author: Robyn Peterman

Publisher:

ISBN: 1941377009

Category:

Page: 299

View: 585

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And I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard...That's nothing compared to being a mother. Sweet baby Moses in a boob tube, there aren't any books on raising True Immortals so let me give you a few tips... Make a map of every closet and bathroom in your home if you enjoy having sex. Sleep deprivation can cause confusion and a map will help if you only have seven minutes and thirty-one seconds. You're welcome. Parenting books are useless if you're not human. If your child is half Vampyre/ half Demon I would suggest not using parenting books at all--they can backfire like a mother humper. Trust me on this. Have sex. When your child tells you he has an imaginary friend, do not discount this as fantasy. Often times your child isn't imagining anything. If he persists with alarming and violent stories about this fictional buddy it's probably a Troll. Do a thorough search of your home and kill it. Decapitation works best. Some imaginary friends are harmless. However, it's wise not to take chances. Have sex again. When in large crowds, make sure you hold tight to your child's hand. Losing a child in an amusement park is terrifying. If you're truly paranoid a parent could consider putting a chip in their child. If you do this don't discuss it at dinner parties. People will think you are weird. At least cuddle. Playing with dolls is fun. Being one? No so much. If your child ever finds a Genie in a bottle, flush it immediately. Many children wish for things that are very difficult to reverse...like being doll sized. If this happens, move to Oz. There are many people of small stature there. And yes, it really does exist. Find a closet and go to town.
2015-02-14 By Robyn Peterman

This is holiday paranormal romantic comedy novella for your reading pleasure!

Author: Robyn Peterman

Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform

ISBN: 1530348013

Category: Paranormal romance

Page: 258

View: 459

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This is holiday paranormal romantic comedy novella for your reading pleasure! It's Christmas at the Cressida House and all Hell is breaking loose. Tree? Decorated and lit. Elf on a Shelf? Seated with style. Baby Jesus on the mantle? Fourteen neatly in a row. Life sized Nutcracker? Creepy, but standing proud. Invitations sent to entire immortal family to celebrate the holiday? Possibly the stupidest damn thing I've ever done. Mixing Heaven and Hell on my cousin's famous birthday seemed like such a brilliant idea. I wanted my baby's first Christmas to be special-memorable. I'd like chalk my heinous idea up to having been fallen down drunk, but that won't fly as it's insanely difficult for a Vampyre to tie one on. So instead I'll deal with obscene gifts from relatives, kidnapped rock stars and catering by Mother Nature. To complicate matters, our new family pet thinks the whole house is his toilet. Ethan and I can't even find a room with working lock on the door to spread a little holiday cheer. Never, never again. Christmas from now on will be at a freakin' spa for the undead-no poles for dancing and no slumber parties with the Devil. I just have to make it through the next twenty-four hours without beheading a beloved one. Merry freakin' Christmas-and Happy New Year.
2016-03-02 By Robyn Peterman

by Robyn Peterman ***** Praise for Fashionably Dead Uproariously witty, deliciously provocative, and just plain fun! No one delivers side-splitting humor and mouth-watering sensuality like Robyn Peterman. This is entertainment at its ...

Author: Ann Charles

Publisher: Ann Charles

ISBN: 9781940364445

Category: Fiction

Page: 390

View: 583

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Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned ... especially a dead one holding a grudge. Back on Deadwood's list of Usual Suspects, Violet Parker is hip deep in wild frights and fired-up females. After juggling bitter threats, haunted buildings, and vengeful ghosts, the last thing she needs is a pair of bullheaded detectives trying to pin another murder on her tail. Can Violet find the real killer before she ends up behind bars? Or worse, on a slab at the morgue
2016-08-25 By Ann Charles

THE FASHIONABLY DEAD PRIZE: FOR THE CLOTHING SUPERSTITION THAT EVERYONE LOOKS GOOD IN BLACK GRAVE AWARDS: FOR INSULTS THAT DON'T STOP JUST BECAUSE THE. 249 The Going Out in Style Awards.

Author: Bob Fenster

Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing

ISBN: 9780740793042

Category: Humor

Page: 328

View: 960

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From the genius of funnyman Bob Fenster, who brought you Duh!, They Did What!?, and Well, Duh!, comes another in real-life idiocy. The Duh Awards honors the intellectually challenged and utterly inept. From historical explorers to politicians to celebrities to everyday people, no one is spared from lampoon. Ever notice there seems to be an award show for just about everything? And that everyone who wins is rich, beautiful, and brilliant? Good-looking, intelligent winners are everywhere. The Duh Awards is for the rest of us. These awards are handed out to the not-so-smart, the underworked, the overpaid, the wacky, the weird, and the downright stupid. And it's about time! Chapters include such ridiculousness as: Boss of the Year and Other Slave Driver Awards; Champion Scoffers, Scorners, Insulters, and Other All-Star Wise Guys; and Only in Hollywood-The Anti-Oscars. Here are just a excerpts from this hilarious book: The Know-a-Little, Talk-a-Lot Society presents the Anti-Expert Awards: In 1931 President Herbert Hoover somehow missed the impact of the Great Depression when he offered this solution: "If someone could get off a good joke every ten days, I think our troubles would be over." Winning Mind Games: All-Star Shockers, Psych-Outs, and Gross Champs: During the halftime show of the 2004 Super Bowl, singer Justin Timberlake removed part of singer Janet Jackson's shirt to reveal one of her star breasts on national TV. This upset viewers who had tuned in to watch rapper Nelly grab his crotch. The Spin Awards for Fooling Most of the People Enough of the Time: In 2003 Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld told the press: "As we know, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns--the ones we don't know we don't know." The Duh Awards celebrates the moments that some would rather we forget.
2010-04-01 By Bob Fenster

Ladies and gentlemen, the holy dead! It is easy, in fact automatic, to imagine these fashionably dead Trin- acrians, men, women and children alike, when left to themselves in the dead of night erupting in cackles and crooning, ...

Author: James McCourt

Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company

ISBN: 9780871404589

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 323

View: 778

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The author of Queer Street reminisces about growing up in New York in the 1940s and 1950s, describing games of chicken on the Long Island railroad tracks, steam calliopes in Central Park and losing his mother. 15,000 first printing.
2013-10-21 By James McCourt

Waiting in the woods for some animal to wander by while I freeze my ass off in hopes of shooting it dead, and then taking a knife and ... the diner is just fashionably dead wrong, but after that it is just none of my freaking business.

Author: Richard Woods

Publisher: iUniverse

ISBN: 9780595405756

Category: Self-Help

Page: 248

View: 565

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Unlearn! Because Life Can Make You Stupid is a kick in the groin to the self-help industry. Without any sugarcoating, author Richard Woods confronts societal normalcy, political correctness, and perceived morality in a blistering attack on today's American culture. Americans continue to practice certain unrealistic behaviors at the urging of many so-called self-help gurus. For example, even though the diet and relationship industries gross millions of dollars each year, people continue to gain weight and get divorced. Woods maintains that if you want to make a real change in your life, you must be honest with yourself. You need to unlearn much of the ideology ingrained since childhood and reinforced by the "self-hurt" industry. Woods also challenges the traditional view on monogamy and its place in marriage, offering a series of perspectives on matrimony far different from those you have been conditioned to believe. Unlearn! is not intended to enlighten, nor does it offer the key to the vault that contains any special wisdom. Instead, it is a mixture of facts and opinion based on Woods's years of experience and observation. Whether you choose to agree or disagree, Unlearn! will open your mind to an alternative world of possibilities.
2006-09 By Richard Woods

dead body. A body that wore a Stay Puft jacket just like the killer wore in the surveillance video. ... been one helluva struggle, and he was damned lucky it was Reese who was alive, and not the guy now fashionably dead on the floor.

Author: Kym Roberts

Publisher: Kym Roberts

ISBN: 9780990550662

Category: Fiction

Page: 199

View: 917

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Flirting with the Devil by Kym RobertsSometimes the greatest sins...are born out of love.Federal Prosecutor Samantha Bennett knows how to weed out the bad guys and put them in their place--behind bars and that's exactly what she did to the mob boss of Vendetti la Cosa Nostra. But her dedication cost her what she values most, her marriage, because she didn't see her husband's betrayal coming--at all.Wade Evans will do anything to get Sam back--and a plot that enlists the people she relies on the most is his best chance of winning her heart a second time. But suddenly Wade's not sure he's the right man for his soon to be ex-wife, because he wasn't the one to save her from the violent mob hit. He failed and the man she trusts most, Ty Beckinsale, saved the day.When Sam takes a vacation alone, both men arrive to keep her safe from a hitman determined to put her six feet under. And now Sam must decide if heaven on earth is possible, or if the man who stole her heart will lead her straight to hell.
2015-09-15 By Kym Roberts

I know that some people who've read the book thought that it had ended too positively , that I should have left him fashionably dead , so to speak . My feeling was that there were seventy - five thousand dead Salvadorans already , and I ...

Author: Bruce Dick

Publisher:

ISBN: 0816522758

Category: Literary Criticism

Page: 229

View: 123

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A collection of interviews with 16 prominent Latino poets reveals how they found their niche in American literature and what political and social issues helped shape their personal and creative lives.
2003 By Bruce Dick

comprising works by the most popular and fashionable writers of the present day ... Mr. Leslie Canning was good - humoured , and as lively as the absolute necessity of being fashionably dead to all excitement would permit .

Author:

Publisher:

ISBN: BSB:BSB10747926

Category:

Page:

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1835 By

“I'd hoped to get the award tonight, but homosexuality isn't as fashionable as it once was.” He shrugged. “Res ipsa loquitur. That's Latin for 'the facts ... A dead man speaking a dead language.” His voice dropped, and he bent his head.

Author: Olivia Goldsmith

Publisher: Diversion Publishing Corp.

ISBN: 9781626814363

Category: Fiction

Page: 548

View: 547

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A clothes designer tries to coordinate her out-of-control life, in a novel from the New York Times–bestselling author that’s “juicy good fun” (Newsday). All of Karen Kahn’s dreams seem to be coming true. She’s been honored with the fashion industry’s most coveted award, her marriage is thriving, and some very impressive money is being dangled in front of her in a proposed buyout. The only thing missing is what she craves most—a baby. When she receives the heartbreaking news that she’ll never be able to have a child, it feels like the doctor’s verdict has pulled a loose thread—and suddenly everything seems to be unraveling. Now she has to take a hard look at her life and figure out what really suits her and what doesn’t . . . “This new novel by the author of The First Wives Club works at every level. An engaging, behind-the-scenes look at the fashion industry, it lays bare the frenetic pace, cutthroat competition and chronic backbiting of the world of couture. Also an engrossing family saga, it shows 40-year-old Karen, who is infertile, desperately trying to adopt a baby and, as an adopted child herself, searching for her birth mother. The narrative also offers a hilariously dark portrait of Karen’s immediate—and totally dysfunctional—family. A glittering New York social backdrop, plenty of namedropping, romance, some outstandingly creative characters . . . A book that fairly hums with excitement.” —Publishers Weekly
2014-10-14 By Olivia Goldsmith

And on the bright side, if I starve myself for a few weeks, I could start to look fashionably dead.” “Buy the vest,” Buffy urged. “You love it. You may not want to wear it until the weather cools down, but it will. Someday.

Author: Nancy Holder

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 9780743432894

Category: Fiction

Page: 288

View: 867

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It's summertime in Sunnydale, and Salma de la Navidad, a friend of Buffy's from Sunnydale High, needs help. She and her family immigrated to America, and now she fears her brother, in an attempt to gain social acceptance, has stumbled into supernatural gang warfare. To make matters worse, an unknown creature has been doing a little night stalking. Buffy is certain that this new demonic presence has its roots in L.A. -- Angel's turf. So with the help of the Slayerettes, she heads off to battle demons -- both actual and personal. Meanwhile, in the City of Angels, Cordelia stumbles upon a vampire-worshiping cult of runaways as Angel investigates an invisible presence wreaking havoc in the local prisons. Now Buffy and pals must deal with identity crises of their own. Buffy may be the Chosen One, but she is, ultimately, expendable. Angel is unique, yet his particular status isolates him from humanity and monsters alike. So while all wonder -- do I make a difference? -- the humans and demons who surround them answer that question in astonishing ways...
2001-08-30 By Nancy Holder

Many thanks to the hilarious Robyn Peterman (Pick up Fashionably Dead to see what I mean!) for her insight and to my Krew for their support. And thank you to Chris, Lauren, Milo, Marcia, Craig, Pat, Mike, and Doe for all their love and ...

Author: Kathleen Brooks

Publisher: Laurens Publishing

ISBN: 9780988210882

Category: Fiction

Page: 265

View: 112

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This is the fifth novel in the Bluegrass Brothers Series. The bigger the secrets, the bigger the explosions… The mysterious Cy Davies is finally coming home. And he’s not coming alone. The lone wolf of the large Davies family had made a successful career as a stuntman for himself. But it wasn’t fake bullets flying when he rescued a sassy investigative reporter in a dark alley. Cy decides to takes her to the one place he knows he can keep her safe—home to Keeneston. Gemma Perry was having the worst week of her life. Now she finds herself in a small town where gossip is the currency, a place where she should fit right in since she’s an investigative reporter for a gossip magazine. During the most difficult time of her life, Gemma must trust the man that came to her rescue to unlock the clues and bring down a dangerous criminal intent on silencing her. With their lives in danger, will Gemma and Cy be able to discover themselves and true love?
2013-10-07 By Kathleen Brooks

... and gave them a rather morbid place of honour in their homes. It is likely that visitors often mistook these motionless animals for extremely well-behaved pets. Fashionably Dead Using poison to kill someone became known as 29.

Author: Alastair Williams

Publisher: Summersdale Publishers LTD - ROW

ISBN: 9781848395640

Category: Humor

Page: 126

View: 891

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Did you know that washing your teeth with charcoal was once believed to make them whiter? Or that Victorian ladies were encouraged to drink vinegar in order to appear pale and delicate? The Victorians may have given us the Industrial Revolution and advances in medicine and science, but they also relied on child labour and extolled the benefits of opium. From the strange to the downright unsavoury, learn 'What the Victorians Didn't Do For Us'.
2005-10-10 By Alastair Williams

Mr. Leslie Canning was good - humoured , and as lively as the absolute necessity of being fashionably dead to all excitement would permit . At least he seemed to think the company present worth the trouble of quizzing , and appeared not ...

Author:

Publisher:

ISBN: MINN:31951002076300D

Category:

Page:

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1832 By

For all practical purposes, He was suitably, fashionably dead. The saints were quite another matter. Faith in a saint requires something less than absolute dependence. Saints are for people who can't trust in cosmic proportions.

Author: David L. Hall

Publisher: SUNY Press

ISBN: 0791413071

Category: Literary Criticism

Page: 423

View: 650

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This is a novel of ideas. Flatly to say that it is a work of fiction would needlessly call into question the value of those ideas. To claim, on the other hand, that the text is factual, in whole or part, would, after tedious reflections on the meaning of 'facticity, ' likely be judged a lie.
1992-01-01 By David L. Hall

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